Some people always pay more!

".... I can't take it anymore. I am helpless. I am already crying here. I am in a lab. Don't say anymore ....", those were the messages on my chat screen at 3 AM in the morning. There was a momentary pause, before I replied anything back. I typed, "then just sit there and cry"!, hit enter and then watched the screen blankly, trying to analyze my action. I knew she must have been very close to me for me being able to type that, but WHY?!!!

Well the answer is that I actually didn't want her to continue to be on the wrong side, the side which always pays more. I realized this while chatting to her. She was being dumped after a two year courtship. The boy suddenly realized that he can't go against his mother. Thereby, he had given the conscent to his parents to go ahead and search alliances for him. Hmmm, common isn't it! Ya, but here are a few more details, the girl had fought for the same time with her parents. Trust me guys, if she would have given a go-ahead to her parents, there would be a bee-line for her. But then she couldn't bear to be anybody else's wife. When she confroned him with the question, "Do you understand how much this is going to hurt me?", he supposedly said that it is fine with him if her parents start finding alliances for her. Afterall, he was still trying. But his parents were about to meet her parents and formally put an end to their story.

Nothing very strange or unusual. I wasn't moved by the sequence of events at all. What troubled me was a set of questions. Why is it that she is suffering more? Is it because she chose to care mor efor him than anything else ? Does she care about her parents as much as he does for his? Does going against her parents hurt her as badly? Don't her parents have the same concerns and wishes from her as anybody else's parents? Havn't they been dreaming about her and her marriage since the day she smiled her way into their world a few decades back? Sadly, the answer was yes to me for all the questions. So she was paying more because she was ready to pay more. She was being forced to make a huge sacrifise because she was the only one who was ready to make it!

So for the next hour, I asked her to be selfish! Think and care about her and her parents! What advice was that?!!!!!!!!! But I chose it over soothing her, going to sleep and feeling good about it. Ofcourse, I could have come up with awesome lines and made her smile and giggle for the same time. But, then how long will that have helped her? Well, I think the maximum that it can last is till the next morning when she opened her eyes and took stalk of the world around her. So what's the point?! So I rather asked her to be strong and selfish. We literally screamed out her feelings, her pain, her anguish and then parted smiling. I hope that thought and that smile lasts her more than a night. I wish that new thoughts and smiles originate from this new channel of thoughts. I hope she never has to pay again, because of all people, she chooses herself to go through pain rather than anybody else!

I think that both of us changed during the course of that conversation. Both of us had atleast started thinking about paying less! And I am glad that this was the outcome!

P.S. I seek forgiveness from the guy and his parents. I know they would be going through tremendous amount of trauma. My intention was not to hurt them or anybody who has been in their position.